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Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Loving the alone time

Hey, it's great to hear from you again. I read your blog (tried leaving a comment but sigh, unstable connection.), and I can totally feel what you are talking about. I sometimes feel I've neglected so many of my friends due to maybe time constraint, money constraint, distance or just being pure selfish, wanting more and more alone time. You are a God sent wake up call to look around me and love the people around me for being who they are and for loving me. Thank you for the msg left on my wall, totally made my day. We really should hang out soon.

-Ping Ping-

This is the message I'm trying to post on Cheng Ling's fb. Not sure if I'll be able to do it tonight. Connection has been not so stable lately. More juniors using already I guess. Anyway, as this will happen ALL the time (what i'm going to say next, not the bad connection), I guess it's gonna be some moments when I look into the mirror and rearrange my priorities.

I was told by a friend that I make people smile. Because I'm bubbly and funny. Don't know if it's a good thing but I guess to have the gift to make people around me happy is not at all a bad thing even if sometimes they are laughing at me (can totally sense some people coming up to me purposely just to laugh at me =.=" Why I got friends who love me like this?)

I don't know if it is because I laughed too much just now (bad thing bad thing, will feel so empty after that), I'm feeling empty now. Like hollow inside and just need to fill it up with something (not food). But I never really got around to fill it, I'll just space out and be alone. I wish I'm not such a thinker. Yes, you read it right, I think. I don't just blabbered nonsential things although I look like one. Ok, maybe I do. Whatever.

Ok, done emptying out my empty heart to a blog which is empty -not much readers. I really wish I stop running away from crowds, from social life just because I feel like being alone. My social life is close to none, I don't even know if I am allowed to mention that word. Yes, THAT BAD. I'm eating lunch alone, dinner in my room or walking alone to classes and although it bothered me a lot, I think I began to like all the alone time.

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