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Thursday, April 26, 2007

Down lately

No, not down as in down syndrome. Lately been feeling a little weird. I don't feel like doing what I always do, don't feel like doing much, been really emotional as in cries very easily * I actually cried while watching tvb drama just now.* , been feeling really tired and feels like giving up at any point. I suppose I am reaching the peak point according to my MUET textbook and I don't know any ways to distress. Actually, the main problem is that even though I can distress, it'll come back in a snap. And then I will go through all the I-wish-I-am-dead process again. I hate that feeling and I hate feeling that helpless. It makes me moody, makes me lose a lot in life. I don't want to be like that. But can I fight STPM without feeling this way? It may take me about 8 days to complete STPM. 8 days at least and I am hoping that I can fight this like a man girl. I am feeling all the giddy giddy nausea thing again. It is scary, seriously.

Can suggest ways of keeping stress at a healthy level? Share your experiences with me. Lately, many things happened and it is breaking me down even more. Seriously, I am even breaking down because of some reality show contestants didn't make it through. And I have been really worn out. I mean I dream every single night, mostly a forgettable dream or worst still, night mares. I wake up in the morning feeling like I have not been sleeping, having dark rings around my eyes, I rarely have that. There are nights when I can't sleep and have been thinking a lot. Thinking is not a good thing for me because I tend to think of rubbish that I should not even be thinking. Consequently, I have been late for school pretty often lately. I hope any SGGS prefects read this and forgive me for being late, stress is catching up with me. =(

When I am unhappy, I enjoy listening to songs. Chinese ones. And if you are also into Chinese songs, you would have known that they have lots of very sad and touching songs which triggers my tear bud. I am close to crying and I just don't like it. When I feel sad, I tend to hop onto my bed and sleep. Even if I can't sleep, at least I can drop a tear without being questioned by people. I hate being questioned. I am not dealing with my stress well and I am not ashame to shout out loud that I NEED HELP!!! =(

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