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Sunday, July 29, 2007

Are all parents that noble?

That, you tell me. I am a very sensitive person and I admit that I get angry over things although at times I don't know much and only see it from the 3rd party point of view. However, I cannot just sit still, watch them and then keep my mouth shut. I am the type of person who will stand up for other people but when it comes to me, I will probably swallow it down with a big gulp or venture my anger elsewhere unless I cannot accept it anymore. Well, this is only applicable when I am out around with my friends. At home, I am a big big devil. Just like Pao. =P

Anyway, I have this relative. As her husband cannot give them money to feed themselves in their own place (in another state, I don't know where), the mother brought her 4 children back to her mother's house in Penang. Well, first of all, I am pretty pissed off thinking that the mother, knowing that her husband cannot feed them even with 2 children dares to give birth to two more and their age gap is realy small. Like a year or two only. And the boy unfortunately is a special child. Therefore she claims that she cannot work because she needs to take care of the kids as her mother cannot really take care of them.

Secondly, the thing I am angry about is the husband. He is a real irresponsible man. He brings shame to all fathers in the world. I seriously think that a man who cannot feed his wife and kids because he gambles or drinks or has concubine outside should not be respected as a man. I heard that he spends his money drinking and gambling and even treating his friends which eventually put him in heavy debts and he cannot bring back money for the family. And now that the wife is back in Penang, he comes back once a week or something like that to see the kids. I don't think he deserve to be called a father. You have four kids at home waiting for you and if you love them, I think they wouldn't have to come to Penang. With his more than RM3000 salary (I think it is more. I am not sure), his daughter have to owe people money in order to buy her laptop. Don't tell me her daughter can't think for herself. I am leaving this out for now.

My family and I are very lucky because we have real nice relatives who brought us out of our problem but by the age of 7, my sisters 11 and 15, we took care of ourselves. My eldest sister brought us to school on the first day when I was 7. I can still remember my eldest sister bringing us on bus and she had to carry our books. My mum, on the other hand, worked to bring us up. Dad was not around but mum never gave up. If people were to say my relatives helped us, well, if my mum did not work, I bet even super relatives couldn't help us. My eldest sister and second sister are very responsible and we proved to them that we can live and we can be successful. We are now all successful in our own way. Mine is yet to be seen but it is coming. I hope. We get help but we did not act as though we are princesses. We stayed at home without our mother around each day after school. We do not go around mixing with people at our area which is a good news. That family however is super bad luck to have such relatives. RM5.00 of eggs also must count with them. The rich one don't care, the poor ones have no ability to even care. Seriously what is wrong with them?

Actually the thing that triggers me to to write this today is the fact that the father thinks it is alright. My grandma always buy something for them to eat because they are often left hungry at home because they do not have money to cook a decent meal. They said. Today, we bought 4 packets of Chicken Rice. One for the grandma, one for the grandchild, one for the mother and one more for my grandma. My grandma had hers and that father took TWO FREAKING PACKETS OF CHICKEN RICE!!! How inconsiderate? His wife got nothing to eat and the daughter had to share with her grandma. And according to the stories I heard from my grandma, the father can't even give the mother money and he dares to come and eat the rice. Just like few weeks ago, he ate the nasi kandar we bought for his daughters and wife. And his wife, said nothing. -.- If he was my dad, surely he kena tiger claws all over already. My mum will never let him. My mum always put us first. We are always important. My dad, as horrible as he can be, he will not eat all and leave us nothing. Perhaps we resemble our mother. =P Lil tigers. My dad is a weird guy, he once bought 20 'siew mai' for me and my sis and now, I hate 'siew mai'.

The mother, the father, the grandmother, the aunts. All don't know how to think one. I dread thinking how the kids will be when the two small ones grow older. I seriously against the idea of not letting the mother to work and earn her own income. If you get a very good husband then different story. Still, women should not stay at home and shut herself from the world outside. People changes. You can never know when your husband will. If you say trust is very important in the relationship then continue trusting your husband. The 2 weeks in China is just a work trip. Even if he has to go there like once every month. -.-

Women should not stay at home and not earn her own income. We must not depend on guys totally. We must stand on our own feet. If we do not have our own income, the husbands might think that we are weak, we cannot go anywhere but to be with him. So, WORK!! Want to stay at home take care of the kids?? Can. Earn USD from blogging like 5xMom la. Anytime earn more than working like mad outside and still have to see the boss punya muka. Never ever shut yourself out from the world, the fashion and your circles of friends. And earn some money so that you can survive on your own. Be independent, can?

ps: From a girl's point of view. No, she has not gone out there working and actually experience life in a whole but she strongly believes that women are NOT WEAK!

2 comments: said...

I read and read so interesting. Tiba-tiba, aiks, masuk air! LOL. But sad fact is some women memang weak, no stand on their own and keep blaming 'fate'. And there are many of them out there.

Mrs Chong said...

Yes. I really cannot tahan such person. Especially when she is a mom herself. For the sake of her children, why can't she work?? She often quarrel with her mother and refuse to cook. No one wants to cook and the kids eat what? Eat wind lo. If we buy for them, sometimes things like what happened last week happens, don't buy, the kids will not get anything to eat. Sometimes very geram. They should be helping themselves. If they don't help themselves, no one can help them.

When I was small, if my mum chooses not to work and sit at home with us everyday, I bet we won't be able to be who we are today. My mum worked so hard and provide us with lots of tuition classes, send us to school and make sure we do our part as her child. And seriously, my mum is someone I will look up to.