Maybe, it's not so bad

after getting it out. =)

Ok fine. I didn't exactly let it out, but it felt like I did. Does that count?

It was a good day.

Happy Independence Day.

<3 the island girl

It's back

Do not trust me to go to the market (or anywhere at all) without coming back with something.

I thought I killed those shopping bugs but they are still lingering around, waiting for the right time to reappear.

T_T I bought clothes in Tesco, I bought shoes in the market. Seriously, I can buy wherever I go.

Need to stop this or I will have to find a job. Or get a rich husband. I think the former is easier.

Gonna label it as things I should remember lest I forget. One day, if I'm like super poor or something, I'm gonna look back at this and say, "Serve you right Ping!!".

But I love my shoe. /shy. *wave to shoe*

It's complicated

How now brown cow?

Getting more and more complicated. Need to untangle this or I myself will get caught in there too.

It was just an innocent crush. What did I get myself into again?

God of my dry bones

There are times I felt that I'm so wounded, so scarred, it's impossible to be healed again.

And God is telling me again and again, nothing is impossible for Him.

I told myself it's impossible for me to tear down my wall, just to let people trample all over me, take advantage of me and then leave me to clear the mess.

It has happened for way too many times, one can't help but to think, aiya, impossible one la.

Whack my head for thinking that. =) God will heal. God knows our pains, He knows. Someone once told me, Ping, stop running away. Stop living in denial. Stop making yourself believe that you are okay when you are not.

I guess today is one of those days, I really am tired of running away, of hiding myself, of telling myself it's impossible. It's one of those days I believe that God can heal me. That He can bring back life to my dry bones, even when people have suck out every single living cells in it.

I thought I know what I was doing

Maybe I don't. I don't know anymore.

It's getting harder to read minds, not that I can in the first place.

Seems like all of us are reading it wrongly.

I'm tired of this guessing game.

Pulling out. It is too deep, I don't think I can do it.

Or maybe I'm just tired today.

*hide in the room (in my heart cause I have a freaking class now).

_____________________________________________________________

*bang head on the wall*

Ok, emo moments over. =) Chirpy Ping is back.

明知我爱你 MV - 龚芝怡 Serene Koong

And it's never easy. Loving this song now. If only... Nevermind.

Welcome home

*breathes* Yep. The smell of home.

Finally home, to roll on springy bed and watch television. And download emo chinese love songs.

I'm home. Saw Charlie the bug, yep, totally home.

=)

________________________________________________________

I really hope you know what you are doing. /pats

From awesome

There are moments in our lives when we find ourselves at a crossroads.


Afraid. Confused. Without a road map.

The choices we make in those moments can define the rest of our days.

Of course, when faced with the unknown, most of us prefer to turn around and go back.

But once in a while people push on to something better.

Something found just beyond the pain of going at it alone.

And just beyond the bravery and courage it takes to let someone in.

Or to give someone a second chance.

Something beyond the quiet persistence of a dream.

Because it's only when you're tested, that you truly discover who you are.

And it's only when you're tested, that you discover who you can be.

The person you want to be does exist.

Somewhere on the other side of hard work and faith and belief

.... and beyond the heartache and fear of what lies ahead.

By Peyton Sawyer



To Awesome.

♥ + *hugs*

Wall up

Had this great short talk with a friend and YES! Need my wall up.

I guess lately I've been thinking of installing a window, just to see how's the world outside after 4 years of carefully putting up brick by brick, layers and layers of cement.

Even thinking of installing a door to welcome people in. But I installed a window for people to look in.

And I'm feeling insecure now. Got myself some brick and slowly putting them back.

Am I ready for people to come in and mess up my house again?

Is this person a hygienic person who'll clean up his own mess or not mess up my place?

Is he even willing to come in and have a seat? I don't know. And Ping Ping hates uncertainties.

Uncertainties top in her hate list.

*slowly drawing herself out* kthxbye.

Remind self :

You were once a strong wall that I lean on whenever I feel weak. I relied on you to boost my confidence, to acknowledge my existence and to support me. I relied on you so much that whenever something happened, I will run to you for support. Then one day, without warnings or signs or whatsoever, you walked away and I fall hard. I fell so hard, I couldn't stand up on my own. It took me courage, strength and determination to slowly find myself back and stood proudly on my own two feet. I told myself that I will not lean completely on a wall ever again. I've been more cautious on the steps I take, the walls I put my hands on and the road I choose. Even if you look like a strong wall once again, I swear I will never lay my hands on you.

May 2007

Found a better wall to lean on ever since. A wall that will not crumble on me, a wall that will stay firm.

ps: Pardon me for swearing at that time. I was a young girl =P

Dreaming much?

One of those dreams that you do not want to wake up.

Or perhaps I'm just tired.

Sometimes I wish this dream is real. It feels real to me. Some is saying that it's not a dream, some is saying, don't put your hopes high.

Well, if dream is the best I can get, I shall treasure and hold on to that.

Each time I feel that I'm happily floating in the air, I'll get snap back to reality.

Welcome home, they say. Welcome home.

ps: On the contrary, I'm HAPPY to go home. Away from home for.......2 weeks *hide* don't throw rocks at me, look at their poor lil face, it hurts them as much as it hurts me.

Home + Family = ♥